Hey,
I haven't kept this blog updated but have thought about it a lot in this past year. I'm not the best with time management to say the least, but the last month or so has made me more determined to make sure I document my next couple of years, even if it's just a scrap of a blog post.
A quick summary of what happened since I last posted (which may change as I have a bunch of drafts I need to complete):
I achieved ABB at AS level, in Media, Mathematics and Further Mathematics- which was far better than I thought I had done, but not quite up to where I wanted to be
I sent of my UCAS! I applied to Bristol, Birmingham, Nottingham, Royal Holloway and Surrey, all for Mathematics
I attended a couple of taster sessions to uni's I hadn't seen but had put down as an option, and learned about String Theory at Surrey
Managed to get conditional offers from ALL my universities!!!!!!!!!!!! Even Bristol!
Applied for a scholarship with Surrey
Was granted a scholarship should I meet particular grades
Settled on Surrey as my firm and Royal Holloway as my insurance
Started my A-level exams! AHHHHHHH!
Okay, so we're all caught up. It's the end of May, the middle of my half term and I have 6 exams left (five maths, one media). I haven't been revising efficiently and my moral is at rock bottom. I have a Mechanics and Further Pure maths exam on the same day, first week back at school and they're my two worst modules, it's an absolute nightmare.
During exam season, we all face moments of self doubt and anxiety. Although it's important to be ambitious and to work hard, it's also important to take care of yourself, both physically and mentally. When it comes to revising, try to alternate between revising with friends and by yourself, changing location too, as the same scene can demotivate your mind. If you find yourself taking a break... for two hours, definitely either go to bed or change your scene, it's better you recognise you're not being productive and take care of yourself than carry on feeling sorry for yourself whilst doing nothing about it. Those nights before an exam, I KNOW you wanna stay up late and revise until your brain explodes, but a) that's not healthy and b) it's unlikely to improve your grade by much. A good night's rest will ensure your brain is awake and ready to tackle all kinds of questions your exam boards are throwing at you, and you'll be less likely to make silly mistakes in terms of spelling or calculations.
Last year, I had a breakdown the night before my media exam. I had lost my revision notes and they held critical information in answering half the paper.
I stayed awake until ungodly hours, sent a crying selfie to my teacher via email when I found half of my notes, and cried the morning of the exam, having missed the bus I wanted to get.
I got 100% in that paper.
Sometimes it'll feel like the world is against you, that the module you're studying is the WORST thing in the world and that the exam board detests your guts - but you're capable of anything and everything. I've learned the importance of self-belief this year. Sometimes it takes mindset and confidence to make questions that little bit easier to attempt. If you walk into an exam believing you're not going to do well, and you see a question that looks nasty, you're unlikely to do as well as somebody who walks in confidently, who sees that nasty question and believes that although it looks UGLYYY, it isn't impossible. Oh, and if you aren't sure? Just write down a bunch of key words that might relate and hope for the best xx
Be sure to reward yourself. My teacher said to sacrifice my social life over this month and a half, but that is not healthy at all. "Work hard, play hard, work harder". We need balance to stay sane. If you're a crazy revision nut who needs no friends to get through exams then I am very jealous of you but most of the human race aren't blessed with such a trait and it's important to have down time so that other parts of your brain can exercise while your nerdy chunk of brain has a nap.
Oh, and if you're tired, listen to your body. Sleep is your friend. Try to keep it regulated. Avoid caffeinated drinks the night before to ensure the BEST rest in preparation for an exam.
Recognise how far you've come these past two years (or however long you've been studying for). You've developed as a person, you've worked hard and you've already achieved so much. These exams don't assess everything, and they certainly don't define who you are. Keep in mind that you're more than how well you can memorise a module, or how much you've practiced integration. You're kind and thoughtful and loving! You're smart, no matter what kind of grades you get.
Life ain't gradable baby, and the world will keep spinning whether you achieve highly or not.
Look after your pals during this time, because I can assure you, most will be on the verge of a breakdown. Take time in your day to check up on those who haven't seemed quite themselves of late, and don't take it to heart if somebody seems blunt with you. Often, the tiredness of exams makes us exasperated and irritable, so please give us moody teenagers another chance.
Revise when you can, but try to squeeze in half an hour of downtime at LEAST in each of your days, whether it be painting, dancing wildly to some crazy music, face timing your pals, ANYTHING, just so long as it calms you down and releases some fuzzy lil endorphins into your body.
Which reminds me, exercise is a great stress reliever! If you have the energy, I greatly recommend, but I've found that I just don't have the time (nor energy), to squeeze it in this exam season, sooo I'm not quite speaking from experience here.
Your future isn't set in stone, no matter what you achieve. There are all kinds of ways to reach the top right now, it just may take you a little longer than originally planned. Be proud of yourself, for each and every small thing you achieve. As a maths student, I see psychology students with some of the thickest specs I've ever seen and don't know how they do it, but I know that other students look at maths papers and wonder how on earth any of us even get our heads around the question! We all have our own successes, and it's important not to compare yourself (ever), but especially during this time because we all learn in different ways.
Three years ago, I hadn't even thought about university. At the start of year 12, I was sure I was going to attend a top 5 uni and get a first. Midway through Year 12, I had the option to drop out or resit a year. At the end of Year 12, I thought for sure I had screwed up my exams and wouldn't get into any decent uni.
Year 13 came along, I received 5 offers and those included Russel Group universities! I achieved a scholarship and have also decided... that I think I want to defer for a year.
This brief moment in time is stress inducing, guilt-bringing and tiring, but it is temporary. These grades mark two years of your life, but you have decades more to live and achieve and dream.
When Edexcel, AQA and OCR hand you lemons, make a lemonade margarita with your tears and tequila xx
Good luck my dudes
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